There have been so many times when I have noticed Matt looking at me and I can see the sadness and heart break in his eyes. I cant imagine the fear he feels. I keep a lot of my symptoms to myself trying to lighten his worry load but he knows, he knows I hide it from him. What am I suppose to do? This isnt what he signed up for. Its very hard for me to cope with the fact that Im a huge burden on our lives. I have been sick our entire relationship and he has been taking care of me from the beginning.
I want to badly to free him of this pain and hurt.
He has sacrificed so much from me. He has stopped performing music, his alone time, hanging out with his buddies, and so many other things that he loved to do. Most of the time he puts my needs and health first... and that is hard on me emotionally. Music is his spirituality and I have seen it change other peoples lives. God plays music through Matt and Ive never seen anything more beautiful than when he loses himself in a song. He has stopped doing the things that he loves and he has stopped them because of this disease.
So please, in all your pain and suffering... remind those that love you, how much you appreciate them. They have their own emotional battles to deal with. Just because we actually have this disease doent mean it doesnt effect them. They have to appear strong to keep us going... and a lot of times they are on their breaking point too.
I am very blessed to have Matt Green in my life! He takes care of me, picks me up from the floor when i cant even crawl, he does my iv treatments, cooks, cleans and all while having a FULL time job. how did i get so lucky to have someone that cares so much? One day i will be healed and ur lives will be so much fuller and ill be able to return the favor!
lyme often breaks up friendships, relationships and so many other things.... it has made us grow stronger! the love we share is larger than the universe and i am so grateful for that!!